It's been a very long time since i have not right everything but I enjoyed reading the past entry, to remember all the people I was so in love with and i nearly forgot now, to remember all my dreams i was writting about and i mostly achieved.

I'm back from the US, I 'm back to France and  it's weird. Of course living one year in the US in Joh  Carroll University Cleveland Ohio was from far the best experienced i ever had.I was told about the reverse cultural shock but at that time i was missing France so much that I laughed about it, how it could happen to me?? Now it's been 3 months that i'm back and i'm still feeling this cultural shock. It's like having two countries when i was in the US i miss all about France and now I m back home i'm not sure which one is my real home. The only thing i  can think about is to go back there, but i have a little problem: a boyfriend. No commitment should be rule number one of the traveler.

L'homme de ma vie vient de me tomber dessus, ou peut être c'est juste une personne extraordinaire, que j'ai envie de découvrir et on est en train de se découvrir on en peut plus de se découvrir, car on a des choses en commun déjà, la musique, le cinéma, le sexe… C’est génial, c’est vraiment la meilleure chose qui m’est arrivé de toute ma vie, ou au moins récemment, L’amour enfin ! l’excitation, les sourires, les on sait pas encore comment être ensemble, parce qu’on ne se connait pas, qu’est ce qu’on est ? On s’embrasse, on se présente à nos amis ? Ils sont un peu inévitable quand on vit avec eux et c’est tout mignon tout doux, tout on n’ose pas vraiment, et c’est si joli, c’est l’illumination dans ma vie, soudain quelqu’un d’adorablement sexy et gentil et mystérieux un peu aussi s’engouffre dans mes bras, m’enlace, me fais des bisous dans le cou et me souris avec un sourire à mourir et des petits yeux qui pétillent de bonheur autant que les miens

So here I am I am in Cleveland, I arrive on wednesday after 8hours fly from Paris to Chicago and then 3hours waiting and finally 1 hour flying from Chicago to Cleveland.

In fact i m not really in cleveland but more exactly in university heights i havent been  yet to cleveland may be tomorrow cause there is nobody at uni yet and the surrounder are quite residential so im starting to get bored. i m the only international student for the moment the others will arrive at the end of the week.

Right now i just came back from the librairy where i wanted to connect but there was an old guy  masturbating i must confess i was shocked !!!!i warn the guy at the reception desk but when i came back 5 mn later the masturbator was still there. Fortunatly I am in a jesuit university...

I am gonna leave and I don't think I realize it yet.

I have not realized I am going to spend one year away from everything: my sister, my parents and my friends. they are not just buddies, now I know them for more than 10 years, we have spent each day together for 3 years now.

I will be alone in a unknow place with perfect strangers.

For the moment I do not fear, I do not think about it in fact.

I am in a nostalgic mood, I think I miss Kwamé a guy I 've met in Paris, that I saw back in Amsterdam. No in fact I only miss tenderness and love. And it will not come from him. I ve been dating lots of guys latley, I had lots of fun, but at the end the thing you miss in reality is not sex but love. It sounds too romantic for me. I am in really melancolic mood, a sweet sadness, le spleen, this sweet empty melody . Unable to think, realise I just feel a bit sad.